Satanic Worship: A Children’s Guide

http://sineaterproductions.com/satanic-worship-childrens-guide/

“I know this may sound a little frightening to you, but would you believe me if I told you this magical God-beast wanted to be your very best friend? He can grant you whatever you wish, like Santa Claus except you don’t have to be bad or good, you only have to be yourself. Whatever it is that makes you happy makes the Supreme Goat Father happy. And Satan, unlike Santa, doesn’t come round only once a year. He is there for you whenever you call upon his cursed name!
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People will tell you that Devil Worship is bad. That it’s the wrong decision to make. Parents and teachers will warn you that it’s a negative path to go down. They may even react more adversely than you expected. You could be grounded for cut off from your allowance. Remember, though, this is only because of they are afraid of the powers you are about to harness. For this reason it is best that you keep your new religion hush-hush from your family and even some of your friends. It is okay to lie if it’s in your best interest. Your bond with the Lord Of Brimstone is a special secret. One that should not be casually shared with others.”